How can I ask the Lord this???

Hello Dear friends,
It's worse than we thought, way worse, if that is even possible.

Our baby has been diagnosed with Alobar holoprosencephaly, a condition where basically the brain does not divide into two hemispheres, but rather is in one u-shaped chunk. We are undergoing further testing tomorrow to test whether there is also an underlying genetic condition like Trisomy 13 or 18, which they are suspecting. Basically, it looks like our child may not be able to breathe on its own, or have a pituitary gland which is required to control hormones which control various functions like kidneys, for example. In most cases, this condition is fatal. We are beyond devastated and have cried a million tears. It is likely that this is a genetic condition, so we are probably done having kids as well. It breaks my heart to know that Sophie will probably be an only child.  Our lives are in complete turmoil right now - our worst fears have come true.

We should know at our 15 week u/s the degree of severity of this condition, but they are suspecting the most extreme. The mildest forms can manifest themselves in developmental delays, similar to Down's Syndrome, while the most extreme can cause facial anomalies, like the absence of a nose, one eye instead of two...and death.  We do know that our baby has two eye sockets and a tiny nose, but the face is 'smooshed' and affected.  They believe that we are leaning towards the most severe end of the spectrum.  In milder cases, the child might be expected to survive, despite severe mental and physical challenges - but they are preparing us for miscarriage, still birth or death after delivery.  This happens to 1 in 4000 babies, so about once a year at their hospital and I guess we're just the lucky ones. Sadly, it breaks my heart that as a parent all I can pray for is a peaceful death for this baby - please continue praying for us, we need all the strength we can muster.

We are undergoing transvaginal CVS testing tomorrow [they take a part of the placenta for genetic testing] and we should have preliminary results by Thursday indicating if our child also suffers from Trisomy 13 or 18, or Down's Syndrome in conjunction with the above. I just can't believe that this is happening to us...in a way, again.  No parent should have to think about their child's funeral before they are even born...

Prayers needed my friends

Hello dear friends - the few of you who still stop by, despite me being MIA for a while now. I do play on updating my posts, as this is therapeutic for me and its a lasting footprint of the journey that we are on, but right now I can't deal with any of that.

I'm here asking for prayers to our good Lord. We had our 12 week u/s yesterday and got an urgent call this morning. Things are not looking good. Our baby seems to have serious problems - there is a concern about Down Syndrome as the nasal bone appears to be absent, although the NT cord fluid is good, so our chance of Down's is 1/410, which is pretty low. However, there appears to be a cyst or fluid or space in the brain, there are abnormalities with the abdomen, there is a problem with one of the legs. They are throwing around Down's, encephaly, trisomy 18 - basically not sure at this point what we are dealing with. We've been told that it likely that our child may not be able to survive outside of the womb, if we even get that far. We're being rushed into our local genetic clinic here in London, which is apparently the top place to be in Ontario [I guess London and Hamilton specialize in this]. We'll likely have some new blood test, another u/s, a fish [similar to amnio] and learn exactly what is going on either tomorrow or Friday. For us, termination is NOT an option unless my life is in extreme danger. We're both devastated to possibly be losing another child, but we hope and pray that the ultrasound is wrong - the baby was extremely active and wiggly, sucking his fingers, hiccups, the whole nine yards. Maybe, just maybe they are wrong on this - the stomach issue could correct itself with time as sometimes the intestines look like they are outside the stomach at this point, but there just seems to be so much going on. Please pray for us, that this baby ends up being healthy and that Dave and I can somehow get through all of this. I just don't know what I think, what I feel - I've cried all morning - we're trying to stay positive until we know for sure....also, as silly as this sounds, if you know of any non-traditional healers, miraculous places nearby, anything, I'm willing to try anything to save our baby.