Hello there,
As I've mentioned before, my EDD is coming up on March 10th. I'd love to get some ideas on how we can memorialize that day - I don't want to say "celebrate" as it won't be a celebration, but I would like to start some kind of tradition for our angel.
So far, the only things I could think of were to release balloons, and frankly I don't know if there are "environment friendly" balloons that won't hurt wildlife. We live in a climate where early March is still winter and there will be snow, so releasing butterflies will kill them instantly from the cold, its too cold to plant a tree or flowers. I just can't think of anything.
If you have some ideas, or you'd like to share what you did, I'd love to hear it!!
Thank you!
For Nicholas, Sophia, and Alexander, we have memorial dinners and remember them. For my miscarriages, I have to be honest, we dont do a "big" thing. It is usually a time that I want to be alone and reflect inward. I write them a poem, I sing them a song, I share a moment with them in meditation. But, for me, those days are a very solitary experience. It's different too because I dont really even note EDDs other than to say oh, that's the day. For any of the kids, Bobby and Maya included. For me, my m/c are the day I began bleeding, and the other kids it's their birthdays.
ReplyDeleteSomeone at our support group planted a tree, but a small variety and in a large pot, so it would be trasportable to a new home, if need be. My husband made a valid point once, when I wanted to memorialize the dates. He said if we set up a tradition, and at some point can't follow through (weather related, committments to family or work or whatever) then we would probably feel an immense guilt. So we don't do anything in particular. I know all the dates, and like Michele (in her comment) it's a pretty solitary moment. And a rather subtle one. And if I choose to do some remembering on a different date as well, then I do.
ReplyDeleteHope you find what you need to bring you a tiny bit of peace on that day (& every day).
Thanks for your thoughts ladies and I certainly respect your perspective on things. This is a date that is forever etched onto my heart and I certainly think about our angel every single day - not a day goes by that I don't remember. As this was our only child, I can't help but want to make the EDD and the day we lost our baby somehow more "special" than every other day. We had a memorial mass for our baby on our anniversary, and that was very special for us. I had requested a mass for the EDD but the church was booked up, so it will be in August, which is fine as it will coincide with the anniversary of the loss. I simply can't let the day go by without some sort of special acknowledgement.
ReplyDelete